


modern au

by jessamoo



Category: Reign (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-22
Updated: 2014-11-23
Packaged: 2018-02-22 05:54:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 9,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2496947
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jessamoo/pseuds/jessamoo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>just a collection of modern au drabbles for Bash/Kenna</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> for the prompt "Bash hates all the men Mary sets Kenna up with"

As they waved Kenna and her latest date out the door, Bash leaned heavily on the door way not sharing the excited smile Mary is sending him.

Seeing his frown, she pouts at him. Seeing him staring stonily after Kenna and the date she had found her she rolls her eyes and turns away.

“Shut the door bash.” She calls wearily.

Mary flops down onto the sofa, tucking her hands in the sleeves of her jumper and grabbing the bowl of popcorn on the coffee table in front of her.

Bash sighs but complies, following her, slumping onto the sofa.

Mary rolls her eyes at him. “What?” she asks expectantly, annoyance in her tone.

Bash shrugged at her though he knew he wasn’t being subtle in his dislike for Kenna’s date.

“What was wrong with this one? Hmm?” Mary raises her eyebrows. “Was he too short, like the last one? Too old, too blonde? Any of the other ridiculous reasons you’ve found to be a complete arse to the men I set her up with?”

Bash rolls his eyes but he knows she has a point.

 

After what she had termed her ‘extremely rare, extremely frustrating dry spell’, Kenna had asked Mary to find her a nice guy. Mary had taken the challenge in her stride and found her several. 

Bash had been against the whole idea. Not of Kenna being happy – never that, but he saw the boys Mary found for her and he knew in seconds they weren’t the right guys for her.

He knew Kenna better than the back of his hand. These random men, all boring carbon copies of one another, blurred together in his mind. Kenna could do better, and for some reason he seemed to be the only person who saw it.

And he had made no secret of it. Each boy that timidly knocked on the door had been greeted by a scowling, unimpressed Bash. They had stuttered as he stared at them blankly until Mary had elbowed him out of the way breathlessly, glaring at him.

 

Bash looks at Mary now and sighs. “There was just something…off about him.”

“Off?” Mary echoes with a disbelieving smile. “Now you’re just making things up.”

Bash looks away from her grumpily. “I don’t see why she needs a boyfriend anyway. Why not be single for a while? Kenna is ridiculously independent. That’s a good thing.”

“Kenna calls you in to get spiders out of her room.” Mary drawls. “and maybe she’s lonely…and anyway, don’t lecture me like that, I don’t need your straight white boy view on feminism thank you…Kenna might just want someone to sweep her off her feet and that is a perfectly fine thing to want.” She stiffens authoritatively. 

“Well I’m pretty sure that guy isn’t going to sweep her off her feet. Doubt he could, he was so skinny.” he mutters.

“Well I’m surprised you noticed, you were staring at Kenna so much.”

Bash reaches out and flicks some popcorn at her which she evades with a squeal.

Mary gets distracted by the TV then and Bash thinks about what she said.

He didn’t think she had noticed him staring at Kenna when she came down. It’s not like he’d planned on it or anything – he had seen Kenna dressed up a million times. But something was different about tonight and he didn’t know why.

When Kenna had come down the stairs where he and Mary – and the date whose name he couldn’t remember – had been waiting, his breath had caught. She had floated down like a dream, dressed in white, her hair curled up in a halo on her head. It had been like everything else melted away, like she was the only light burning in the world.

As she’d reached the bottom of the stairs he’d forgotten anyone else was there, and when her wide bright smile had been directed over his shoulder to her date, everything had snapped painfully back into focus.

He had seen how her dress dipped low at the back, graceful spine on show, soft warm skin itching to be touched. Her dates hand had moved to the small of that skinny back and his fingers moved to just touch her skin. That single tiny twitch, that one fingertip against her suddenly felt violent to Bash. Like touching the statues of muses in a museum. Like eyes spying a goddess bathe. There was something intrusive about it. And he hated it. Hated the idea that those freckles, the jutting of her collarbone, had been claimed for the night by that faceless moron.

He couldn’t work it out. She had had boyfriends before. He’d seen boys leaving her room with clothes bundled in their arms and he had left her to it. It had been none of his business.

But now he counted her as one of his closest friends – if not his best. They had spent nights upon nights staring at stars and reading and watching cheesy movies. This new boy didn’t know any of that. He didn’t know how she named her own stars, how she made up her own stories about them – calling them mermaid tears or trapped princesses. None of them knew who she was like Bash did. He wasn’t being possessive, it was just a fact.

They didn’t know how she liked to read poetry out loud to him, or how she liked to drink tea whilst reading Austen and Coffee with Kerouac. They didn’t know how she loved lame old zombie movies and pretended to bite at his neck.

She was like a constant ebb and flow, a steady sea beating against a shore. Calm waters that hid vast depths. Vast capacities for love and kindness and intelligence under the cool girl demeanour she liked to show everyone else.

He liked to pretend he wasn’t jealous, but he knew he was lying to himself. But he was only jealous of the time they were spending with his friend.

Of course, only that.

 

Mary went to bed a few hours earlier than him. He had sat on the sofa with the remains of the popcorn staring blankly ahead, not seeing the movement on screen. For some reason he felt desperately lonely in the knowledge that Kenna wasn’t pottering about upstairs, or softly sleeping. 

 

A few hours after she had left, he hears the door open and Kenna tip toed inside. She obviously didn’t realise he was there, because after slipping her shoes off he heard her slump against the closed door and sighed loudly.

He sat up and looked at her. She closed her eyes for a moment and they flew open at the sound of him standing up to move toward her.

“Bash.” She breathed. “What are you still doing up?”

“I was waiting for you.” he shrugs with a friendly smile.

Kenna smiles at him but he notices it doesn’t quite meet her eyes.

“Did everything go ok?” he frowns seriously, quickly stepping forward in worry. “What did he do?”

Kenna waves him away. “He didn’t do anything…it was me.”

She shakes her head sadly, staring at the floor. He realises tears are forming in her eyes and he reaches a hand out, placing it gently onto her cheek.

She leans into his touch and looks up at him. “I keep going on all these stupid dates, lying to myself. There perfectly fine people, but I can’t enjoy myself.”

“Then why do you keep doing it to yourself?” he asks disparagingly. 

Kenna shrugs self-deprecatingly. “Because then I would have to admit why I asked for them in the first place.”

Bash’s hands move to her elbows and he tugs her close to him so she has to bend her head to peer up at with those wide, sad eyes. He couldn’t bare to see her sad. It made her look so cripplingly fragile and he felt worthless, not being able to soothe a storm.

Kenna stands on her tip toes then and slowly, so very, very slowly, her eyes flicking back and forth from his eyes to his lips, she presses her lips softly on his. He feels his eyes drift closed instantly.

Kenna pulls back sharply. “I’m sorry.” She whispers shakily.

“Don’t be.” Bash whispers back, keeping her close to him. “Just tell me why you go on all these dates.”

“I just did.” she says, staring at him. “Because…because I don’t want to admit to myself that I…” she trails off and he sees the terror in her eyes.

“That what?” he’s asking despite knowing the answer. It was inside of him already like an age old prophecy. But he wants to hear her say it.

“That I love you. That I’m in love with you.” it comes out in the smallest voice, like nothing more than a breath of wind. She flops her head down on his shoulder. “Please don’t hate me.”

Bash picks her face up in both his hands. “How can I hate you when I love you too?” he smiles, his lips already moving against hers. He feels Kenna gasp and he presses his lips against hers, moving his arms to wrap them around her waist and back, pressing her impossibly close to him.

As his fingers brush over the low back of her dress, aching over her skin, he picks her up in the air and she laughs happily before kissing him again.

And so, in the end, Kenna got what she wanted.

She got swept of her feet.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> for the prompt " friends with benefits turns to love"

Bash was showering early in the morning – rolling his neck, relaxing aching tired muscles.

He’d been stressed recently, far more than usual. He couldn’t concentrate on anything and he found the majority of things annoying, especially the fact almost all of his friends seemed to be in couples now.

He was happy for Greer, who was steady and practical but a secret romantic. Happy for Lola, who was beautiful and sweet, that she was dating someone who seemed as good natured as her. A part of him was even happy for Mary and Francis.

He had cared for Mary when he’d first met her, but now is jealously stemmed from loneliness. 

Only Kenna wasn’t seeing anyone and he assumed that was by choice – a girl like her could have anyone she wanted. Half the guys he knew on campus already wanted her. He didn’t know if was oblivious or just didn’t care, but her unassuming, cool act drove them all crazier and it amused him endlessly to hear her many stories of guys asking her out.

At least it used to amuse him – recently he’d found it less so. He assumed it was protectiveness – he and Kenna had been growing a little closer and he wanted to make sure she was ok. But sometimes, when he really thought about it, he felt a tiny spark of something, if he didn’t know better, that felt like jealousy. Jealously at having someone be interested? Jealousy of people wanting to steal yet another friend away? Or maybe jealousy that it was Kenna they wanted?

He didn’t know, and the questions still plagued him as water splashed onto his face – but even that torrent couldn’t wash the questions away. 

He didn’t want to like Kenna like that. Not after everything that happened with Mary. Falling for friends was a decidedly shitty idea and he knew better.

 

Suddenly the door flew open and Kenna strolled in casually.

“Whoa!” Bash yelps in surprise, trying to preserve his modesty, a warm flush crawling up his cheeks.

“Sorry!” Kenna trills, sounding anything but. “I left my hairspray in here.” She begins pottering around with the products by the sink and Bash rolls his eyes.

“It’s fine.” He snaps. “Can you just get out please?” he throws his hand up without thinking and Kenna glances down. Bash remembers himself and shoots his hand back to where it covered his privates.

Kenna doesn’t look phased and she doesn’t leave. She leans against the sink as her slow gaze trails over his muscled, athletic body. Then an appreciative smirk appears on her face.

Bash presses his hands in a little more as his body reacts to Kenna’s smile, despite his brain willing it not to. Because her smile had been very approving and very tempting.

She shrugs and pushes off the sink, slinking out the door way with one last meaningful look over her shoulder.

Bash turns down the temperature of the shower to cold. 

 

Then he feels it, after that morning. He feels them inching closer, gravitating around each other, waiting to collide.

And when they finally do it’s a night like any other, and they’re watching TV. Kenna is in a vest and shorts, long tanned legs stretched out over his lap. She’s flicking through the channels, pretending not to notice his fingers lightly trailing over her skin.

“Oh, friends with benefits is on. I love this movie!” She smiles, settling in.  
“I am not watching that.” Bash replies.

He lunges to grab the control out of her hands and she squeals. As he turns it over to something else he holds the control in the air out of her reach.

Kenna grins at him and dives to grab it back, but he moves it further. She moves right up next to him and when she can’t grab it she moves her legs onto his.

And then suddenly the remote is forgotten in a sudden breathless stillness. She’s sat on his lap facing him, looking down at him with wild bright eyes.

Bash moves his face up a little, but doesn’t kiss her. She shifts knowingly on him a little, and dropping the remote, his hands move to cup her butt, holding her in place. 

“No consequences.” Kenna breathes. “No strings? Just once with no problems?”

“God yes.” Bash whispers back before their lips crash together and they kiss ravenously, all tongues and hands.

 

But of course, it didn’t just happen once. And it wasn’t without problems, as these things never are.

Because after that night he can’t stop looking at her. Can’t stop wanting to touch her, can’t stop missing the taste of her on his tongue.

And that’s why every time she comes back, he lets her. He knows it’s stupid, knows the risks. Every time he or Kenna has to creep back to their rooms quietly or make up an excuse for where they had been. Bash realises he’s falling in too deep, but he denies it to himself. He should be clawing at the walls as he fell, trying to slow himself. But instead he embraces the abyss and the comfort he finds between her thighs.

He doesn’t know how Kenna feels about this. For all intents and purposes she was fine. She was acting just like she said. They were friends with benefits and nothing more. No strings, no problem. But he began to wonder if it was more, when she slept comfortably beside him or rested her chin gently on his chest.

 

He doesn’t know what to do, it was all going wrong. He couldn’t let her go, the length of her body pressed all against him felt so deeply ingrained on his psyche that the idea of losing it was impossible. It would be like losing a limb. But he knew he couldn’t keep going on as they were, him pining even more miserably than before and her oblivious. It would tear them apart. 

But if he told her she might back away from him and he’d still lose her. Either way it wasn’t going to end well. And he might just have to accept that.

She shifts in her sleep next to him, a simple, miraculous movement. Kenna rolls over and blinks up at him with a smile.

He doesn’t know what makes him say it. But looking down at her, her warm soft body connected to his, her long fingers stretching over his muscles, he can’t help himself. 

“You could stay here with me.” He whispers.

If she had been thinking, she might have jumped up and ran for it. But in the twilight, seeing the stars blinking down at them, she just smiles. Maybe it’s because that moment in the half-light feels like limbo, feels like it could last forever. But she nods slowly and presses her lips to his shoulder.

“We said no consequences.” She grinned.

“Well we also said just once, and look how that turned out.” He lets out a quiet chuckle.

“We are such a cliché.” She rolls her eyes. “Friends with benefits that fall in love. Ugh, I’m disgusted with us.”

Bash presses her closer to him, taking her hand. “Did you just say you love me?” he asks with a smile.

Kenna shrugs. “I don’t know. Did I?” she teases.

In reply, Bash flings her onto her back, moving on top of her, kissing her happily.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> for the prompt "bash thinking of how different he feels with kenna compared to mary"

It was surprisingly easy with Kenna. Not in the boring kind of way where you go through the motions with no effort.

No. easy in the way you hear about in songs. Easy and honest and the first good thing he’s had for a while. Kenna always sees him, really sees him. It easy because she knows instinctively what he’s feeling or when he’s lying.

It hadn’t been that way with Mary. There was always a shadow over them, he had to fight for her affection against his own brother. He would have to convince her and bargain with her. He wasn’t the heir to the company like Francis – he was the bachelor half-brother that no one expected anything of.

It had always felt like Mary liked him in spite of all that. Kenna though loved him without it being a concern either way. He had come to realise that he much preferred that. She wasn’t thinking about who he wasn’t, only loving him for who he was.

He had thought, through all the difficult times with Mary that that was what they all sang about, wrote about. He had come to realise though that it had simply been exhausting and painful with little pay off. When he had trouble with Kenna, when they fought, it was with passion and love and rage. That was what a relationship was about, even when it was difficult. It was difficult because you loved each other, not because you were wishing you didn’t.

Sometimes he had to reassure Kenna that whatever he had felt for Mary had faded away now, like it wasn’t ever there. In some ways it had simply been practice for the real love of his life – his wife.

He would kiss her forehead and she would lean into him, like it was the most familiar, easy thing in the world.

And it was.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> for the prompt "their friends get tired of the ust and lock them in a room"

They had been tip toeing around each other for weeks now and it was becoming literally unbearable.

Lola smiled and thought it was sweet and Greer thought it was best to leave them to their own business. Mary on the other hand had to stop herself from yelling out every time Bash and Kenna made bedroom eyes at each other and thought no one noticed.

It was the night of the house party that the others began to share Mary’s annoyance.

They watched Bash and Kenna move around the house. They would separate then meet again in another room, flirt, then leave again. Then dance and leave. Then flirt and leave.

Their friends watched their weird little dance for hours. After a while it became ridiculous as they both flirted with other people to make the other jealous.

Eventually, to everyone’s surprise, its Greer who is the first to role her eyes and jump up.

She looks down at Lola. “Get Bash and bring him to the closet up the stairs.” She said to her authoritatively. Then she turns to Mary, who is smiling now. “We’ll bring Kenna.”

“Why on earth – that’s ridiculous Greer.” Lola laughs, but when he sees Mary flying up to start on Greer’s oh so obvious plan she scoffs.

“Why would he come with me to a closet anyway?” she asks pointedly.

“Just make something up!” Mary hisses, grabbing Greer’s hand and starting over to Kenna.

 

“Are you sure there’s no more beer downstairs? Why would there be any in the closet?”

Bash keeps asking questions that Lola can’t answer as they make their way to the aforementioned closet at the top of the stairs. He isn’t particularly happy to be taken away from Kenna.

He didn’t know where it was heading, but he was enjoying the ride. Kenna brought out a liveliness, a humour in him. She brought out the competitiveness first. He knew they both wanted the other, but he certainly wasn’t going to give in first. And he doubted she was inclined to either.

He steps into the dark closet, flicking a light on when suddenly the door closes behind him.

“Mary, are you sure you left your jacket in here? I can’t see it anywhere.”

Bash turns back wildly confused, to stare into the dimly lit shoebox room at Kenna, who had stood up and was now blinking in confused recognition at him.

“Bash…” she warned teasingly. “I’m not in the mood for games.” She smirked in a tone that suggested she really was.

Bash shrugged with his hand up, forgetting about their little war for a while. “I came up here because Lola wanted me to find beer…which is clearly not in here.” He adds, sighing as he realises what’s going on.

He turns back to the door and tries to open it – he is unsurprised to find it locked. He bangs his head against the wood door gently.

 

Then Kenna is elbowing him out the way tugging frantically at the door.

“Hello? Were still in here!” she calls, banging aggressively on it.

Bash grabs her hand and rolls his eyes. “I think that’s the point.” He mutters dryly.

Kenna’s gaze flies up to his angrily. She’s about to start ranting but the notices how he’s still holding her hand.

She tugs it away from him and crosses her arms, leaning against the door so he has to step back to avoid being pressed against her.

He can feel the tension in the air between them. He hadn’t wanted to be the first to give in, but she smells like sandalwood and she’s wearing pink lipstick and he wants to kiss her desperately. She’s staring up at him with wide eyes, and he knows if he tried, she’d let him.

So he steps toward her and leans down impossibly slowly…and as their lips almost touch…

A loud shriek from a party guest is heard outside and they break apart, trying to ignore the pit of desire coiling in their stomachs.

“That’s exactly what they want.” Kenna shakes her head, understanding suddenly. 

Bash frowns at her because he sees the familiar sight of her mind whirring and planning.

She looks up at him a moment later, a smile on her lips.

“We’re going to Easy A them.” She whispers, in awe of her own genius.

“We’re going to what now?” Bash’s brows knit together in confusion.

Kenna rolls her eyes and turns to face the door again. “Honestly Bash, don’t you watch movies?” she drawls, before nonchalantly flipping her hair and banging on the door.

She surprises Bash even further by leaning her cheek against it and proceeding to make some of the most sexual noises he’s ever head.

He’s too caught up in the moaning coming from Kenna’s lips to notice her frantically motioning to him to copy her.

Reluctantly, he bangs on the door a few times without much fervour.

“Make it sound convincing at least or we’ll never get out of here.” Kenna hisses.

Bash sighs wearily, upping the ante. “I don’t see why we can’t just have actual sex. It’s not like we weren’t going to at some point anyway.”

Kenna stamps on his foot and he jumps away from her, shoving her shoulder. “Sebastian.” She glowers at him between moans. “The first time we have sex is not going to be in here next to the spiders and dusty old jigsaws.”

“Then when pray tell is it going to be?” he smirks and she rolls her eyes, realising she’s been the one to give in first in their little cat and mouse game.

“After you take me to dinner on Friday.” She shrugs.

Bash is about to reply when suddenly Kenna dramatically slumps against the door and screams his name. He certainly can’t wait till he actually makes her do that. And then suddenly, amidst all the thoughts of sex, he wonders what she’s going to look like on their date and where they’re going to go and he feels a more innocent excitement building in his chest.

 

They hear the door click open slowly and they dishevel themselves to make it more believable. Kenna is about to shove her way past their grinning friends when Bash grabs her arm.

He pulls her back in one swift motion and kisses her deeply. Her arms wrap around his shoulders and their friends – as well as some other party guests apparently, hoot and holler at the sight.

“See you on Friday.” He whispers, smiling against her mouth.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> for the prompt "Bash does not know how to propose, Francis and Mary are not helpful, and Kenna is oblivious"

“You have to make it romantic.” Mary explains.

“But not cheesy.” Francis points out.

“And you have to make it a big gesture.”

“But not too big that it scares her off.”

Bash looked back and forth between his friends, perplexed expression on his face.

 

He had come to them in crisis. 

The day before he’d taken Kenna to visit a lake she always wanted to go to. The engagement ring he carried weighed heavily in his pocket and he kept looking for the opportune moment to ask her.

But it had all gone wrong. First they had been thundered into by a gaggle of school children with an abundance of multi coloured balloons. 

Then the next time he began to speak, to try make her understand he was trying to get her attention for something serious, she had ran off excitedly wanting to watch the ducks and birds in the water.

After that, obnoxious teenagers on skate boards. Then a mime that freaked her out. Then a hot dog stand. Then rain.

A million and one obstacles stood against him, and in the end they had trudged home hand in hand, tired and soaked by the rain, and he had put the ring back in the drawer. 

He had come to Mary and Francis, aka the most sickeningly cute couple he knew, to get ideas on how exactly he could propose to Kenna. But so far they were being surprisingly unhelpful and most of their ideas seemed to be things straight out of rom coms, but not exactly doable in real life.

He left just as lost as he came.

 

The next time he tries he goes for the classic restaurant setting. She’s dressed in a white summer dress and he finds the colour very appropriate.

But before he can get down on his knee and ask her, she becomes concerned with the fact they had run out of red wine. She becomes absorbed in trying to get the attention of the water across the restaurant.

“Kenna – “

“One minute.” She smiles at him without really paying attention.

He sighs as the waiter makes his way toward them with a wine bottle. Bash waits for him to serve them and leave so he can get on with the reason they were here.

Kenna looked perfect and it was a nice place, and he was sure this would work. As soon as the waiter left them alone.

But as the waiter approaches the table he trips on something – his own feet, probably, Bash thinks sardonically – and sends the red wine splattering over Kenna’s pristine white dress.

So engagement attempt number too results in a free meal and an expensive trip to the dry cleaners. But no actual engagement. At least not for them, as Bash sees on the wall an array of pictures of smiling couples who had previously been engaged at the same place. Bash feels like their happy smiles are mocking him as he leaves with an angry girlfriend on his arm.

 

So far he didn’t know if the universe was against him or he was just doing it wrong. He had picked places that had been good in theory without considering everything that could happen and had happened at those said places.

The third place he picks would have been perfect, if it hadn’t been stolen from underneath him.

They were stood in a crowd contentedly listening to street performers sing when a girl dragged her girlfriend into the middle. The street performers changed their song quickly to all you need is love as the man got down in one knee.

Granted, Bash hadn’t thought so far ahead as to request a song, but he had been considering a similar plan.

Kenna leans into him wistfully, watching the proceedings with a smile.

Bash can’t force one onto his face, even if the couple in front of them were very adorable. 

The universe was definitely against him.

 

He finally decided on one last attempt. For now at least. He knew he would marry her one day, but he might leave it for a few months if this one didn’t work out. The frustration was starting to make him crazy.

Kenna is stretched out on a picnic blanket with her eyes closed, feeling the sun shine down on her.

Bash, remembering how everything had fallen apart in the space between choosing to ask her and actually doing, decides to forgo that bit all together.

Hesitantly he places the small box containing the ring on the blanket beside her and lays down, resting on his elbows, watching the sky.

Kenna blinks tiredly a few times, and it takes her a minute to focus on the object that had appeared beside her.

Bash pretends not to watch her confused expression.

She realises then suddenly, comprehension dawning on her. She sits up quickly, staring at the box wildly.

“No…” she whispers.

Bash’s gaze flies to her. “No?” he echoes desperately. “Did you just say no? Oh my god are you honestly saying no?” He cries, his face breaking in panic.

Kenna looks up at him with wide eyes. “No! – I mean, no, I’m not saying no. I just…” she sighs and shakes her head.

Then she turns and begins to rummage in her handbag.

Bash is about to ask her what the hell was happening before she finds what she’s looking for and presents it with a breathless flourish.

He frowns at the object in her hand, and then back to his ring box on the blanket.

“It’s a ring.” He says blankly.

Kenna is holding out a man’s ring to him. It’s silver and shining in her palm.

“It was my fathers.” She explains.

Bash picks up his ring box and opens it for her, and she looks down at it grinning.

They both burst out laughing at the same time, exchanging the rings.

“I know it isn’t exactly usual for me to give you a ring.” Kenna chuckles. “But I’ve never seen why women can’t ask men to marry them. And I really did want to ask you.” she smiles at him gently.

“I’ve been trying to ask you to marry me for weeks.” Bash laughs.

They slip the rings onto each other’s fingers ceremoniously. 

“I can put that on a chain for you or something if you’d like.” Kenna asks as she does so.

Bash shakes his head. “I’m going to be wearing a wedding ring aren’t I? Why is this any different?”

Kenna stares down at her own ring happily, wiggling her fingers, testing it out. “A wedding ring.” She grins at the thought.

Then he takes her face in his hands and kisses her. She wraps her arms round his neck and they fall back onto the blanket, tangled happily together, both enjoying the weight of the rings on their fingers.

Bash realises that all the planning and posturing hadn’t been needed. He knows then that the simplest ways were sometimes best, that without asking her with words he had found a way to anyway. She had been searching the same way he had, for a way to get here.

And in a way they found it together, as they would always find their way together.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> for the prompt "kenna watches Mary break Bash's heart in high school and wonders if she's invisible to him"

Kenna saw Mary walking hand in hand with Francis when they got to school.

She instantly looked around, hoping Bash had driven himself like usual and that he hadn’t see this yet.

She spies him across the car park. He’s stood staring after his brother and Mary, keys in his hand forgotten from where he was about to lock his car.

Kenna sighs deeply, feeling a pang of sympathy for her best friend.

 

Bash had been in love with Mary for months now. She supposed it might not have been as bad if she didn’t love his brother instead of him. And it might have been slightly better if she had been oblivious to his feelings.

But Bash had fallen in love with Mary on the nights she spent with him, talking and laughing. Mary had kissed him and chosen someone else. She cared about Bash, in her own way, and Kenna didn’t dislike her for any of it, not truly. It was just difficult because she knew Bash had held out hope that she loved him back and now that hope had been crushed.

It was also difficult because whilst Bash had loved Mary for months, Kenna had loved him for years.

 

She had met him on the sixteenth day of high school. For sixteen days she’d been invisible.

No – literally, invisible. She’d only moved here that summer and so she didn’t know anyone. People even bumped into her in the hallways. Not even because they didn’t like her, they were just oblivious to her.

And then on that sixteenth day, in the break between maths and history, he had helped her pick up her books.

And they had been best friends ever since.

He was the first person that made her feel like she wasn’t invisible. Lately though he didn’t make her feel that at all.

 

She strides up to him slowly with a sympathetic smile.

Noticing her he smiles back but his heart isn’t in it.

“Are you ok?”

Bash sighs – she supposes he had hoped she didn’t see what he saw, or what he felt. But she had, and a small part of him would always expect her to see, the way best friends always did.

He doesn’t say anything so she nudges him in the ribs gently. “Cheer up. You still have me.”

His half smile wasn’t exactly the reaction she had been hoping for.

 

And they spend weeks like that. Her desperately trying to be there for him and him being moody and distant.

She isn’t the type of girl to crazy over a guy, but this wasn’t just a boy. This was her best friend. How do you survive when the person who knows you best doesn’t see you? If the one person who understands all of your darkness doesn’t want you anymore, who would? 

As Bash grows sad and distant so does she. It isn’t because a boy doesn’t like her or because she doesn’t think she’s pretty or anything like that. It’s because she began to realise that none of that mattered. You could be the prettiest, most clever, funny girl in the world – but it didn’t mean that anyone was going to like you for it. And that wasn’t their fault, and there was nothing you could do about it. All the things she had liked about herself were still true, but she saw them as pointless.

 

Mary and Francis were going to be crowned prom king and queen and Bash would be sad and she would be left behind.

 

One night she finds herself wandering. She doesn’t really remember making the decision, but when she snaps back to reality she finds herself outside Bash’s house. She can see he isn’t home because his car isn’t there, and she’s about to turn and walk all the way back home when his father, Henry, invites her inside.

And for some reason all the memories that connected to this place rushed onto her and she felt like she would collapse with the weight of them. So she ruined them to escape the sway of this place. All the hurt and feeling unwanted choked at her even though she willed it not too. And after she sleeps with Henry she cries alone in the bathroom.

When she leaves, she walks straight past Bash in the hallway with a new kind of numbness to it all.

She hears Bash shouting at his father as the door closes behind her.

 

When she’s laying in her bed that night the door creaks open softly.

She doesn’t look up to see who it is, and she feels too empty to even be surprised as Bash lays down softly beside her. He wraps his arms round her and they lay facing each other.

“I haven’t been a good friend recently.” He says, but she doesn’t reply. She just watches him, waiting for him to carry on. “I haven’t noticed everything that’s going on with you…and I think that’s because after I saw Mary and Francis that day in the car park, I realised something…I realised it wasn’t her I was jealous about, or at least not entirely. It was the idea of having someone who loves you like that, who you love like that. And I became so wrapped up in it that I didn’t realise that I’d had that with you for the longest time…but when I did see it, it scared me and so I distanced myself from you to try and ignore it. And I know saying that now isn’t going to fix what your feeling like magic, and I know it might be too late. So you don’t have to say anything. But if you let me stay, I’ll wait here until you’re ready to talk to me.”

Kenna runs a finger down his cheek. “What if it takes me sixty years to want to talk to you?”

Bash smiles gently. “Then I’ll wait sixty years. I’d wait forever if I had to. Because you’re my best friend and I love you...in every sense of the word.”

He was right, it didn’t fix everything that had happened, but it was a start.


	7. chapter 6 part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a continuation of the last prompt was requested so we could see Bash and Kenna fixing things and talking about what happened with Henry.

“I would like to know why, but you know I would never make you tell me if you didn’t want to. Though knowing why might make it easier to sit across from him at dinner.”

Bash was sitting on the porch steps, staring at his hands. She hears the anger in his tone and closes her eyes, though she knows it is not directed at her.

Ever since she had let Bash back in to her life he had been hovering around her protectively. She was grateful that he had kept his word and never pushed her to talk about the day three weeks ago when he had seen her leaving his house, his father. But it was always there, floating between them.

They had been best friends for years and had slipped back into that routine quickly. But Bash was almost too careful around her now. 

Since he had come back to her and told her he loved her, they had kissed each other and held each other while they slept, but they had never defined what they were. Somehow their relationship seemed deeper than that. They loved each other so basically that they never had to explain it out loud to each other. It was just something that existed. It was just a fact. They were together like the sun rose every morning, like the world turned.

And it was because of this, because of the hurt in his voice that Kenna finally considered delving back into what happened. She still didn’t feel entirely herself - Bash thought she was depressed – she knew this because she had seen evidence of him researching it on his computer. Secretly she was inclined to agree with him. But that was just another thing they never talked about.

She sighed heavily. Ignoring everything wasn’t helping. And she knew it was difficult for Bash. He had always known his father was a piece of work, but he had never expected this of him. And it had ruined them. Bash could barely look at his father, and she was the cause. 

 

Kenna glanced at her hands guiltily. She’s perched on the railing and had been looking out into the garden when he spoke.

She sighs and shifts a little before speaking.

“I don’t know how to explain it very well. I felt…invisible. Not just from you, from the whole world. It sort of happened slowly without me realising it. And I wanted to feel real again. Something visceral and tangible…to prove that I could still think, and do and move and exist. I wanted to feel something even if it wasn’t good. It was like everything was blurry and it gave me something to focus on.”

She jumps of the railing and moves to sit beside him. He hasn’t said anything or even looked at her, so she lays her head on his shoulder.

She feels him soften a little and lean his head against hers.

“I am sorry you know.” She mutters.

“I know. I know that.” He replies vehemently, placing a comforting hand on her knee.

She lifts her head and puts her chin on her shoulder, staring at him until her looks up at her and presses their foreheads together.

“I…I regret it more than you could possibly know.” She says sadly. “I didn’t plan it. I didn’t want…my first…I didn’t want it to be that way.”

Bash closes his eyes. “I know that too.” He whispers. “I’m sorry. Sorry this happened the way it did. Sorry my dad is such an arsehole.”

She just links her arm with his and tucks her head back on his shoulder and they look out onto the street together.

 

She’s paranoid at school and with her friends. Bash helps, but she sees their questioning, worried glances and she hates it. She loves them for being concerned, and yet she can’t stand it. All along she had wanted someone to notice how everything was crumbling behind her eyes. And now they did it was like having proof she wasn’t in control of herself. Everything was an exhausting contradiction. Sorting it out gave her a headache.

 

She doesn’t know how on earth Bash convinces her to go to prom. She thinks about it and realises her way of pretending to be fine isn’t working. Shutting everything off isn’t working. Feeling nothing and everything was an awful paradoxical punishment. And so she agrees to go to prom in a fake it till you make it kind of sense. Maybe getting out and being with friends might help her. And she and Bash could be like a normal couple finally. Maybe that would help her gain some normalcy too, some kind of clarity.

 

Kenna had not been to Bash’s house since the day she had slept with Henry. As he walks her up the drive way, assuring her his dad wasn’t home, all she can see is blood stained sheets and empty glasses of whiskey. She can almost feel the burning in her throat, choking her.

 

She’s adjusting her dress in the mirror of the bathroom. Her dress is sleeveless, black and long. Classic but beautiful. 

She’s fumbling with the clasp of a silver necklace, one a little heart shaped pendant that Bash had bought her for her sixteenth birthday, when the door opens.

Assuming its Bash she doesn’t look up into the mirror straight away, but when she does she lets out a yelp.

Henry is home and he’s standing close to her in the tiny room with a lazy grin.

Kenna stiffens uncomfortably, her hands stilling. She doesn’t try to disguise her hatred or fear.

“Let me.” He says, ignoring her quite obvious distress as they stare at each other through the mirror.

Before she can protest she feels his hands against hers, taking the necklace from her.

She feels a blush of panic and embarrassment creep up her skin. Her breathing quickens and she can feel emotion welling up in her. She wants to run, to shove him away but she can’t force herself to move. Instead she lets out a tiny whimper and stays as still as she can until he finishes.

But when he does he rests his hands on her bare shoulders. She can feel his breath against her neck and she can’t take it any more. She feel of his hands against her made her skin crawl.

She tugs herself free of him and whirls around, trying to back away from him as much as she could in the small room.

“Don’t.” she warns, but her voice shakes.

Henry cocks his head teasingly. She can tell this is a game to him and he’s enjoying it. “That’s not what you said last time you were here.”

“Well I should have done. Just let me out.” She hisses.

“I’m not stopping you.” he shrugs as he says this, even though it’s clearly untrue as he steps toward her, the huge bulk of him blocking her exit. “That dress suits you…though let’s face it. A little of the mystery it provides is lost on me. I have already seen what’s underneath.”

Then a furious anger replaces some of her fear. The way he’s looking down at her like she doesn’t matter, like she’s just an object for him to play with. It enrages her. It scares her. So much so that she pushes him with a cry.

“You disgust me!” she spits. “You are a grown man propositioning a teenage girl! You should be ashamed of yourself.”

She tries to push past him then but he grabs her arm and pushes her back in front of him roughly.

“Don’t act so high and mighty. It takes two, remember? You did as much as I did.” He growls at her. “I’m sure you’ve told Bash that I’m the one to blame. Don’t think I don’t know how you’ve poisoned him against me.”

“I told him the truth.” She replies. She can feel tears filling her eyes as his grip on her arm tightens painfully.

There is something in his eyes, something burning in there, something dark that scares her.

“Let go of her!”

 

Both of their gazes fly up to see Bash in the doorway, staring angrily at his father.

“I said,” he growls darkly “Let go of her.”

Henry pauses, his gaze turning to Kenna again but his hand not letting go.

She glances hurriedly at Bash and this time when she tugs her arm away from him he lets go.

As soon as she is free Kenna rushes past him and into Bash’s open arms. Bash’s hand moves round her waist and he steps forward, turning so his body is blocking hers from Henry who is turning slowly to face them.

“I told you before. I told you what would happen if you came near her again.”

Kenna looks up at Bash in surprise but Henry doesn’t seem fussed. He waves his hand dismissively at his son.

“Your empty threats don’t bother me Sebastian. We both know she’s just a silly teenager. She isn’t worth all this arguing.”

“She is to me!” Bash barks loudly, making Kenna jump. “I’m only going to be under the same roof as you until I can move out. But until then Kenna might be here sometimes. Girlfriends tend to visit their boyfriend’s houses you see. And when she is here, you are not doing this. You’re not speaking to her, unless it’s an apology for being a lecherous old drunk.”

Henry rolls his eyes like Bash’s low voice isn’t the least bit threatening. But Kenna hears it. She hears the danger in his voice.

She drops her arms from where they had been wrapped around him and steps forward a little. Bash keeps hold of her waist trying to stop her.

“You’re the one that isn’t worth it, Henry. And the really sad thing is, I mean besides the fact you have to seduce girls to feel good about yourself, is I think you know it. You know you aren’t worth the fights or the threats or anything. And whilst I get to move on from my mistakes you have to live with them, in an empty house with nothing but a whiskey bottle for company.”

She turns away then, taking Bash’s hand and trying to pull him from the doorway. 

Before she walks away though she turns once more to Henry.

“And that’s the last time you ever touch me.” She says.

Then she pulls Bash down the hall to his room and slams the door.

 

He holds her hand the whole night, but for the first time she isn’t desperately clinging to him.

Bash and Kenna walk through the throng of people taking it all in. Everyone in sparkling dresses and sharp suits, balloons and confetti and everything shining. 

She turns to Bash smiling happily and he grins back. It’s the first time she’s really smiled in weeks and they both notice. Somehow the encounter in the bathroom had rooted something in her. Some kind of reassurance she didn’t have before. Some clarity and sense of worth. She understood the incident with Henry much more clearly now. She could look at it from a distance and therefore felt herself being able to move on from it. This fact imbued her with a new relaxation. Like a weight being lifted, like she could finally rest and be in the moment again without thinking about anything and everything except what was in front of her.

And she had Bash. He’d been there for her and he’d been patient and kind like always. His strong arms wrap round her waist as he stands behind her and they watch the dancers.  
He kisses her shoulder and she leans against him with a happy smile.

Suddenly she lifts her head up from where she had rested it against his and turns in his arms, her brow furrowed.

His hands hover by her arms in mid-air. “What?” he asks worriedly. “What is it?”

“You called me your girlfriend.” She smiles teasingly. “You said I was your girlfriend and you were my boyfriend.”

Bash shrugs with a smile. “Well that’s what you are. If you want.”

Kenna rolls her eyes. “Obviously.” She grins, standing up on her tip toes to kiss him.

His hands move to her face to kiss her back lovingly. When they part he presses their foreheads together.

 

They watch Mary and Francis get crowned prom king and queen, and Francis waves to Bash happily when he’s up there. They both laugh and clap for their friends in genuine support.

She leans against Bash and for the first time since this began she doesn’t feel lost in the crowd. She knows it won’t get better straight away, but for the first time she knows deep down that it can. She feels a change in the air. She feels hope, and love, and safety. And she lets herself feel them.

Kenna sighs happily and in the bright lights and music she can see her future, any future, any number of impossible things, and she isn’t afraid.


	8. chapter 4 part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> CONTINUATION OF CHAPTER FOUR

His heart is hammering in his chest and he has that kind of nervous sickness rolling around in his lungs, like they're weighing him down right back against the chair he's sat on, like they're going to break him right through the wood.

Kenna had late classes so she had told him to wait at the restaurant for her. Bash suspected that she just wanted to make a dramatic entrance. Just because they had finally come together for a real date didn't mean their friendly - very friendly - competition had completely died down.

And what an entrance it was.

Kenna was wearing a light, shining dress that looked golden in the low light. Two small clasps on either shoulder glowed like incandescent wings, her hair pulled back in that effortless looking casual way that girls had somehow mastered. Small stray curls hung lightly against her neck where they escaped her up do, and he thinks he might give anything to touch her neck just as lightly.

She reaches him with a breezy smile, as if she doesn't feel half the restaurant gazing awestruck at her, like she was the only star in the darkest night. But she knows it, he can tell, she might smile, but he could read her eyes better than anything.

For some reason, seeing her knowing eyes, seeing her not react to their looks, sparks that old competition in him. He stands up to meet her, glaring at her just as knowingly, showing her he understood just what she was doing.

She raised her eyebrow at him. "What? A girl can't make an entrance now?" She grins, not bothering to feign innocence.

He just chuckles and pulls her chair out for her which she perches on primly, looking around her.

They sit in silence for a small moment. Both of them had been waiting for this very night, now it was here they realised they actually had to participate in it. It was strange. They had been friends for so long now, talked for hours on end about everything and nothing and now they were here they were silent. Like they knew they were on a precipice and the smallest word could be the breath of wind that pushed them off.

Bash sighed and smiled at the absurdity of it. Here was the girl he'd dreamt about for weeks, sat across from him, waiting for him, and he was sat there like a fool.

"I don't know what to say." 

Kenna smiles self deprecatingly and nods, rolling her eyes, glad he had been the first to admit it.

"Why don't you tell me about your classes?" He asks simply and she frowns a little in confusion.

"Really? That's not exactly first date talk, is it?"

Bash shrugs. "It's what we normally talk about. I like when we're us, and I think we should carry on that way. Isn't that what made us want to be here? So...lets just be normal. Be ourselves, and see where that goes."

Kenna nods happily and, needing no further prompting, launches into a detailed account of her day.

They talk and laugh easily then, for hours, just like always. They don't notice the waiter holding wine for them until he slams it on the table, with that fake the-customer-is-always-right too wide smile. They let their starters go cold, though not the rest of it. Kenna would insist he try things of her main course but kept her dessert entirely to herself. Some things, she said, were too good to share. 

At one point a grumpy old man shushed them from a table nearby as Kenna laughed a little too loudly at a story he told her of the time when he was little and Francis had somehow trapped him in the washing machine. Kenna wheezed as he apologised to the man without meaning it.

They talked till the restaurant begins to empty, and the waitress comes to tell them that its closing time and they are forced to finally move from their table.

 

They walk home in the dark, arm in arm, her hair glowing from the street lights. The breeze floats over them, scattering red and orange leaves, floating around them like a dream. Her hand is soft when she takes his, their fingers gripping each other tightly, like it's the last thing anchoring them to the world.

And suddenly then, in a haze of red and moonlight, he can't help the words that come from his mouth. 

"I do love you, you know."

"I know." She grins teasingly. When he doesn't say anything she sighs good naturedly and reaches on her tiptoes to kiss his cheek. "And I love you. I wouldn't have spent all that time waiting if I didn't think there was something worth waiting for."

 

Her hips are small and skinny when he grips them. Like her bones are delicate glass. 

But her kisses are not delicate. They are sharp and ravenous and very, very good. She presses herself against him as he walks them to the bed, her backwards, hands grabbing at him.

And soon that golden angel dress was crumpled on the floor, and all it's light now shone in her eyes, she was ablaze underneath him, warm and soft and burning him up, somewhere deep inside of him there was a hollow pit that filled up with the scent of her.

When he finally slides into her its like the whole world stops, and he knows then where he belongs, which single moment he had been created for. He moves, slowly at first, and she responds by moving with him. Its a silent dance they both knew the steps too, like they had always known.

He begins to pick up the pace, pumping into her over and over as she sighs underneath him, her eyes flickering closed. He picks up her legs in his hands, his fingertip pressing into her thighs as they wrap around him, like he can leave his fingerprints there.

Her legs clutch at him as her desire grows, each rhythmic thrust drawing her closer to him and to the edge of desire. He feels her fingers digging into his shoulders, and thinks that the skin there was made for her to scar.

He finishes just after her, like knowing he had caused that inside of her pushed him to the edge too, like it was all wrapped up together in a haze of warmth and love and need.

He holds her then as she sleeps against him, her limbs all limp and tired. His fingers travel over her ribcage, like its a mountain range with hidden valleys for him to explore. He remembers the night of the party, the way she'd pretended to scream his name. The real thing had been better, it had been nothing they could imagine. It had been breathless and quiet in his ear, a secret only for him. 

He kisses her temple and silently agrees with her earlier words.

Definitely worth waiting for.


End file.
